No but in all seriousness, memes aside, much love to all my friends in the UK right now. I know shit’s about to be chaotic and nationalistic and shitty, and I hope the media circus ends as quickly as possible.
Yeah, no, fuck that. I’m glad she’s dead, and my sympathy goes to the impoverished people of the UK who deserve warm homes, bountiful food, and the complete removal of the parasites that call themselves the monarchy, but who are about to go through a period of forced mourning for someone who was genuinely evil. Money is about to be funneled into a massive display of British nationalism, and it’s disgusting.
Yall know that “toxic masculinity” refers to expressions of masculinity that are toxic, right? it doesn’t imply that all masculinity is toxic- it’s used to talk about like, how people will repress their emotions aside from anger in order to seem “manly”, and how they might act in violent or self-destructive ways because that is what society expects of men.
masculinity is not inherently toxic. it hasn’t been poisoned or corrupted. it is a neutral concept, a kind of gender presentation, and it doesn’t make you a bad, unhealthy, or toxic person to be masculine.
masculinity does not need to be “soft” to be acceptable, it can just be neutral. because it is not toxic, just sometimes expressed in toxic ways or for toxic reasons.
Does this mean there is toxic femininity?
imo? Yes.
Like when white women fake cry to win arguments, or to appear to be the victim (despite how much damage they may have caused), or when female abusers point to their femininity as a reason they couldn’t possibly be hurting anyone. Or when the girls in school weaponize their performances of femininity against more androgynous, less traditionally attractive, or more masculine girls.
Plenty of cis women have a similarly toxic relationship to femininity as cis men do to masculinity. A good example of a less material expression might be the tendency to self-martyr, using the “caregiver” role to guilt trip and gaslight, and abuse in a more manipulative, emotional/mental way than the physical aggression more typical with toxic masculinity.
The patriarchy rewards gender conformity, and requires cis people of both genders to uphold it. Cis women
are at a structural disadvantage to cis men regardless, but can absolutely gain
more social power by adhering more strictly to traditional femininity- and weaponize that power against others.
There absolutely is toxic feminity and the fact that this aspect is not discussed frankly worries me, because it perpetues the “men bad, women good (nb people? never heard of them)” mindset which belong to fringes of feminism I’d like to stay the hell away from.
In 2000 a dam was built on the Euphrates, partially submerging the ancient Hellenistic city of Zeugma in modern day Turkey. Conservation efforts led to the salvage and restoration of many of the city’s mosaics (including the one above), now on display in the Zeugma Mosaic Museum.
